Day 30

I am typically very positive so please forgive me for this post. I think I just need support and to get some of this off my chest. 

Day 30, I should be happy that we are 1/3 of the way done but when I look back at the month we really did have it easy. The hard part is on, and you had better believe this month is going to seem that much longer.

I have massive black and blues on my arm from skipping, tripping and then whipping (myself with the rope). It sorta looks like I am a drug addict… add the recent weight loss, are people talking about me behind my back?

I feel like I am so behind on all of the exercises. I have to break between lunges; I can’t even do a full forty without stopping once. I literally am not strong enough. Not to mention I am completely out of breath and sweating my @ss off. It isn’t like I am not trying. I thought we shouldn’t be doing these and getting winded. I get through the whole work out, just very slowly. Have I mentioned I have never done anything like this in my life exercise wise?

My divinci’s are sad, and sometimes I can’t make it through a single set without having to stop. And I can barely make it through 100 jumps without tripping or having to stop because I can’t breathe. Those that are doing them in less than 15 minutes boggle my mind. I have to now split up my jumps and my strength because I just don’t have the time in the morning. It takes about 25 minutes to get through them. I think I am getting worse at them and not better.

Finally, I am eating really well. Sticking to the diet is the easy part of this whole thing. So why did my weight revert back a few pounds? I know we fluctuate naturally but it has been like this for 4 days now. So discouraging.

This cold I have is kicking my butt. The antibiotics and cold meds they have me on put me in a perpetual state of daze. It is so hard to get out of bed, and I hardly sleep over my nonstop coughing in the middle of the night. My workouts are twice as hard now and not just because they are intense.

I want to be stronger. I want to know that when I get home and do my dip’s I will be able to, but I know I won’t. I have zero upper body strength. My push-ups are a joke. Sigh…. I guess that’s it. I promise to be more optimistic tomorrow.